Why I Have Not Posted My IRONMAN Canada Race Report

47 days ago I became an IRONMAN.  I accomplished my lifelong dream and even writing these simple two sentences sends me into an emotional whirlwind.

To all who have heard me speak about the experience, you may know how much it meant to me.  To those that grew up with me, you may know how much it meant to me.  To those I have met through all walks of life, you may know how much it meant to me. To my Tri Team For Good teammates, you may know how much it meant to me.  To my lovely friends, Marney and Sheleena who witnessed the race, you may know how much it meant to me.  To my mother and brother, you may know how much it meant to me.  To my father, you are part of what it meant to me.  To me, myself, Megan Doerr, you may know how much it meant to yourself, but each day it grows and means more and rears knew lessons and understandings, it continues with you forever, it becomes part of you. So........

The problem is it meant so incredibly much that I cannot even begin to find the words, written or spoken, to give the experience the respect and honor it deserves.  I have tried over and over to write a race report and describe the experience, but nothing reads back to me even close to the level of immense and intense emotions I felt before, during and after the race.   It is my hope that after following the IRONMAN World Championships in Kona, Hawaii tomorrow, that I will finally have the ability to put my feelings into words.  I know it will never be perfectly written, but it is my hope that following Kona, where this goal began, will give me the edge I need to write an exemplary race report about something that deserves a proper tribute.

To those I owe thank you notes, please know you have been on my mind this entire time, I have been waiting to write a proper thank you note that includes my race report.  It is coming, I promise!  I have always been of the mind set to write a heart felt and meaningful thank you, versus sending a quick meaningless note.  I appreciate your support, understanding and patience.

Half Ironman 70.3 Muncie

Ok, so it has been almost two weeks since the race and I have finally decided to write a race report.

I was not looking forward to embarking on this half Ironman, traveling, racing and trying to recover alone.  But, I was fortunate enough to have a co-worker from the Muncie area.  I started this job just 6 months ago and just decided to ask her if she thought her parents would let me stay with them, more to save money on hotels, but it ended up being so much more.  She checked and her mom was happy to have me stay.  Ok, so now I am staying in a strangers house, but that's ok I love that type of stuff and meeting new people.  If I wasn't staying with them I was honestly going to look into couch surfing, going to all these races and competing just really adds up.

Oh wait, my co-worker, Sarah, decided to come down with me, YIPPEE!!!!  I cannot believe how perfectly this is working out, I am so blessed.  I now have company on the ride, including her old little pug Winston, oh the joy, I wish Tico could come!!!!  As you can tell by my previous post I was quite nervous going into this race, just the drive from home to meet her in Mt. Pleasant was dreadful, good thing that was only about 40 minutes.  Once I got in the car with Sarah and Winston things started looking up, although Winston's old pug breathe was less than desirable!  A million bathroom breaks along the way, I was hydrated, many stories about her childhood and the area we were about to visit, all resulted in the warmest welcome to a strangers house I think I have ever received.  These people were amazing, warm, kind, and the best part, HILARIOUS!

After picking up my packet, I was number 555 how cool is that, and running into an old friend from Madison, it nice to see a familiar face who happens to be the timing guy for the event, I did a short little brick (bike/run) and racked my bike in the overwhelmingly large transition area.  The drive back to Sarah's house was interesting, Indiana country roads are very narrow and apparently they don't see a need for stop ahead signs or stop signs that are taller than their corn, I guess they just really want to show case their tall corn!  Now it was time to sit down for dinner with people who already made me feel like a part of the family.  I ate my large bowl of pasta and olive oil as they stared at me very oddly wondering why I was eating that way.  They offered me food and I tried to refrain, but those shish kabobs looked so good, I just had one, mostly chicken and pineapple.  After some enjoyable conversations and laughs about Sarah's childhood I decided to head for bed nice and early.

I set my alarm for 4:45am, aiming to leave the house by 5:15, knowing that would have me out the door by 5:30.  For those of you that don't know I used to live in Costa Rica and they work on what they call Tico Time, always an hour behind.  I have adapted to Tico time and am struggling to remove it from my life, so I have just accepted it.  I made my oatmeal and realized I left my brand new super nice french press with my Costa Rican Moka brand fresh peaberry coffee that I ground specifically for the french press, in my car.  I went out to grab it and BAM I dropped it on the concrete and it shattered, glass everywhere.  My instant reaction was to tear up, but nope I somehow managed to hold it together, probably because it was so early and I was still half asleep.  Ok I searched through their cupboards but nope, I couldn't locate the coffee, such is life no coffee for me this morning.  I considered eating some of my coffee grounds just so I could have the metabolic/bathroom assistance of the coffee, but decided the risk of eating glass was too high and dangerous.  I packed up all my stuff and went out the door, this time noticing my name on the door.  In all my stress and confusion it took a second but then I realized the kindness I was witnessing.  That night they all drew lovely pictures and good luck signs and posted them on the door for me.  I feel so special and loved, that little gesture meant so much to me and I saved all those pictures!

Best Swim Bike Run depiction EVER!

As I drove down the dark tiny Indiana streets a large yellow arch appeared in front of me...McDonalds.  Ok so this is the ONLY time in my life I have been excited to see a McDonalds.  A quick run through the drive through and the coffee gods have blessed me.  I continued driving down the road trying to get my coffee to cool enough to drink, what happens, I set my gps wrong and was going in the wrong direction to a completely different park that had the same name.  Breathe Megan, it's fine, figure out the situation.  I got it figured out while laughing at myself and all these mishaps already so early in the morning, typical to the stress of racing I do believe.  Finally I arrived, got my stuff ready and stood in line for the bathroom only to not really utilize it, such is life, no ability to go this morning, I guess I should've at the coffee grounds.  This detail had to be included as it plays a large role in my race.

Swim
My wetsuit and purple cap are on and I join all the other purple people eaters and sang that song to myself on the beach, though there was perfectly good ramping up and dancing music on the loud speakers.  I was ready to be a flying purple people eater in the water.  Our wave starts and holy crap was it rough.  I had people swimming on top of me, grabbing my feet and not letting go, hitting me in the head and again swimming up my back.  As I started to get annoyed I reminded myself, Megan, IRONMAN is going to be a lot more people all starting at once, deal with this, stay calm, stay focussed and live Darwin's rule, survival of the fittest.  I went on the defense and started swimming and defending myself making way for me to move through the water as a flying purple people eater.  It was rough all the way to the first turn buoy and then started to open up a bit.  Oh wait, not too much open water, as we merge with the back end of the heat in front of us and I start to swim up on people not wanting to be "that" person.  It's so hard to avoid being "that" person, good thing nobody recongizes one another in the water or we might have WWIII.  Then as I made turn 2 (only 2 turns in this swim) to head back to shore, I am BLINDED BY THE LIGHT.  No more flying purple people eater song running through my head, now we are doing a swimming ode to Bruce Springsteen.  As I swam and sang and tried to survive I had to accept I simply did not know where I was swimming and just followed the group in front of me.  Apparently the lead person of that group didn't know where he/she was going either.  As we did a nice WIDE, not so straight, line to the shore.  BAM, I get knocked in the head, directly on the temple as I take a breathe to my right.  Holy crap that hurt, my head is spinning and beyond not be able to see due to the sun I felt very disoriented.  I was happy when I started to see people starting to stand around me.  Yippee I made it and I honestly feel like I could keep swimming, a good sign considering my lack of swim training and the twice as long swim for IRONMAN.

Swim Exit, Blinded By the Light - Seriously the Sun was blinding on the way back in.

T1
As I came out of the water I started to feel a cramp in my right calf, ignore it keep moving.  It was a long run up a small hill to get to the transition and the person in front of my was moving too slow, I have to pass.  Oh wait, cramp, ok so pass and then no need to sprint, but keep moving and work this cramp out.  Then I noticed my watch, WHAT, that was one slow swim, I am NOT happy with myself, but what's done is done keep moving forward.  Considering my lack of ability to have quality transitions I was trying to stay focused.  The wetsuit came off easy, yeah, the helmet in hand and glasses on the face, here we go.  Oh wait I have a long run with the bike to the mounting area.  Once in the mounting area it was a mess, too many people stopped immediately in the same spot, oh well that's life get moving.

T1

Bike
Ok we are spinning and spinning and spinning now.  Stay focussed Doerr, push Doerr, Go Doerr Go.  I just kept repeating this to myself, knowing I tend to get lost on the bike letting my mind wander to la la land and before I know it I am going so slow I might tip over.  I was getting passed left and right too, I just kept reminding myself to stay focussed, check your cadence, keep it high and when it gets too high, shift and get it high again, then shift again and maintain a high cadence (for me high is 85, that is hard for me to maintain).  Then as a cyclist passes me he shouts "Nice Kit", yeah for the IRONMAN Foundation Newton Running Ambassador Triathlon Team  kit, KOKUA baby, we are clad in our bright green and styling for sure.  Oh wait, that's just me, I am the only one at this particular race, that means I'm famous right!  Then as I continue down the road, proud to be wearing this gear, I hear another guy shout "mountain climber you chose the wrong race didn't you".  The guy said it very nicely and jokingly, but yes I sport a red polka dot helmet, which is the design to represent mountain climbers and this course is FLAT.  I love the helmet because it looks sweet and I LOVE to climb, it keeps me focussed and alert, but that does not mean I am a great climber.  I just laughed and kept pedaling thinking of how that helmet will be put to use at IRONMAN Canada in Whistler, up and up I will go.  At one point we turned on some really bumpy road, it was all seal chipped and had tons of cracks making me very uncomfortable in aero.  Though others were in aero I simply did not feel comfortable and didn't want to risk getting too shaken and end up crashing, especially since I don't know how to change a flat tire (mental note, learn how to change a flat tire or give up the cycling).  I finally started to get into a rhythm and it was the turn around.  I looked at my watch, oh crap Megan pick it up you gotta go.  I decided to race myself back to T2, but I actually raced others, for the second time in my life I actually raced on the bike instead of zoning out.  I just kept trying to pick people off one by one.  I powered up the small climbs and shifted to gain as much speed as possible on the declines.  I focussed on staying in aero, maintaining a high cadence and feeling the wind in my helmet.  As I worked to increase my speed I saw my goal time slip away, even though I knew I increased speed by about 1.5 mph average on the way back.  I should've pushed earlier.  As I rolled into T2 I missed my goal time, but I had to smile because I still beat my last and only half ironman time by a  lot.  I know I'm not the strongest cyclist so I have to accept the improvements I get.  Plus, I could've kept biking.  During the only other half Ironman I did all I wanted to do was get rid of my bike, this time I thought to myself, WOW I could keep going.  I was pleased knowing it was a good sign for IRONMAN.  Had I wanted to throw my bike like before, that would not bode well for another 56 mile ride.

Apparently I ride with a little Elvis lip curl....

or a very disgusted look on my face hahahah

T2
Here we go, dismount and move it, running through the massive transition area.  Out of my way people this is not time to talk to family, lets keep moving, I want to get these cleats off and put on my best friend and running shoes.  Running shoes on, race belt on, adios transition area.

Run
I'm so happy to be running, it's time to do what I love the most, one foot in front of the other.  I was cheering people on as I told myself, keep it smooth, keep the breathing under control and remember you can keep picking it up the whole way, the first mile might not be what you want.  As I hit mile 1, feeling a bit slow, I looked at my watch and was in disbelief, 7:13, WHAT.  I asked people around me if they thought the mile marker was right and they did.  WHOA Megan back off a bit, relax, keep rolling but no need to push anymore right now.  My runner friends may be wondering why I would've wanted to relax with that mile split.  Triathlons and running are different beasts and though many people can do those times in a triathlon I personally have not been training for any speed and I did not want the legs to start cramping.  I kept moving forward cheering people on as they came toward me heading into the finish, and those I passed.  I was having such a great time.  I will be honest, the run is a big boost of mental strength and confidence for me during a triathlon, I always get to pass people and that feels good no matter who you are.  I kept clipping away mile by mile taking in a gel at mile 4.  I was at the turn around and looked at my watch and became very confused, 4:40 ish I remember it saying, that makes no sense, how could my half marathon time be so slow.  It took me minutes to figure out that it was my race time.  WOW sometimes you start to lose your mind out there and it's a bit creepy.  But then I realized CRAP Dad would've already finished back in 1988 and I still have about 6 miles to go, so not fair but way to go Dad!  I started to notice that my stomach was feeling very hard but I kept moving.  Then a girl hooked up with me and it was great, we worked together and picked up the pace.  I love leading people on the run to help maintain pace, it made me feel good and I enjoyed helping her while she was helping me.  I kept feeling this hardness in my abdomen, then I started to notice it was a little crampy, this is not a good sign.  But I tried to focus on something else, one foot in front of the other, maintain pace.  As I continued down the road, with her on my shoulder, the hardness was a complete stomach cramp and I knew in my head this was that lack of number 2 bathroom usage for the last day and a half.  A day and a half of food just hanging out in my body was not boding well for all this jarring and running.  It's fine I have dealt with worse, just keep moving.  I told the girl I might cramp and said keep the pace, keep moving, you got this.  She told me she was just trying to keep up with me.  I LOVE teamwork from strangers!  At about 4 miles to go I waved her by and tried to stay on her heels, but to my dismay I lost her.  I went through that water station wondering if I should use the porta potta, but told myself it would take too much time and I was only about 4 miles away.   As I approached 3 miles to go my stomach was really cramping and leading to a bent over posture.  I took in water and kept moving to notice at the next mile marker that my pace rapidly dropped.  The number I saw on my watch was eating away at me, my morale had sunk and the guy behind me, who I had cheered on earlier, was telling me to stand up and keep putting one foot in front of the other.  It was very helpful but I wanted to tell him that I had the training and ability to keep moving at my old pace, I just didn't have the effective amount of bathroom usage in the last day and a half.  I was so frustrated with my body as I kept moving forward.  I told myself that nutrition and stomach issues play a huge role in IRONMAN, but that just made me more upset knowing that I pretty much always have some sort of stomach issue. 1 mile to go and all I wanted to do was cut out my insides and keep running, my legs had it, my cardio was there, I could do this.  As I approached the finish line I REALLY had to go to the bathroom and then I saw the clock and almost broke down in tears.  How could I have slowed THAT much, how was this possible.  Then I quickly realized, OH that's the start time not my time, due to waves, thank goodness.  I smiled again and crossed the line and kept running.  I stopped so they could get my chip, hand me water, a medal and a hat and as I started jogging forward yelled, where's the bathroom?  The lady looked concerned and didn't know, but I just ran off.  I found the bathroom yippee for me, my day can now be over!

I almost cried when I saw the clock right here...then I realized I started in a later wave, fuh!

Heading into the finish....bathroom ahoy

Post Race
After the race I met up with a racer wearing a CMU tri kit.  As I introduced myself I came to find out my Dad and her Dad used to compete against each other in triathlons when we were little.  I sat with her and her mother for a few hours and had some lovely conversation.  Needless to say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree in either case.  Both triathletes, her Dad was an amazing swimmer and she kicked my butt in the swim.  My Dad is an incredible cyclist, oh wait that darn apple flew to another continent on that one, but I did improve today.  She was a good cyclist, I need to train with her, too bad she doesn't live in the area anymore.  Then running, her mom described her dad as loafing through runs and my Dad said he used to always focus on running him down.  Well, my run though not my best, definitely allowed me to run her down.  We both had good solid races and it was fun to talk about the here and the now and the past.  She did IRONMAN Louisville last year and gave me some amazing advice.  She was so kind and helpful.  Though I had feared being alone at the end of the race, I was able to hang out for hours enjoying good conversation and company!

Life is good it really is.  I didn't reach my goal time, I was 33 minutes off my ultimate, yet honestly very unlikely goal (especially considering I trained through the race), I was 18 minutes from my secondary goal which I KNOW I had the ability to get and then 3 minutes from my final goal (all 3 minutes in the last 3 miles that were bathroom related).  But, I have to remind myself it was still a 10 minute PR.

The Test of a Half Ironman

I'm almost packed and ready to get on the road heading fro Muncie, Indiana for IRONMAN 70.3 Muncie.  Ironically Muncie is the same Half Ironman my Father did when training and qualifying for IRONMAN Hawaii 1988.  I have vague memories of watching his race and one involves such extreme heat that I was hanging on an orange make-shift fence screaming and crying.  This results in the Mounted Police Officer bringing me water, so I am told.  I just pray there is no black flag tomorrow at Muncie and the heat does not hurt me like it did as a child.  Fortunately Dad has a good race, so hopefully the family tradition carries through to me.

I have competed in one Half Ironman before and it was honestly the most fun endurance event I have ever competed in, I was smiling the entire time, I simply had a blast.  I don't feel the same joy going into this race, but maybe prior to that race I was nervous as I am now.  I have a huge pit in my stomach, I explode within one word of somebody talking to me, I am constantly on the verge of tears and I am fearful I will not even finish.  This is all absolutely ridiculous I keep telling myself, nerves are normal, you have trained, you have already done this, all you have to do is do it again.  I remind myself that before every race I have always gotten nervous and it ends up fine, this is no different.

If this is a glimpse into how I will feel going into IRONMAN, I am not even as petrified of the race itself, but more of the nerves I will feel going into the race.  If I am this nervous now, I can't and don't want to imagine how nervous I will be in August.  But that's ok, it's just nerves, nerves are normal, nerves are good because it means I care!

So, this fear I am experiencing will hopefully subside prior to the race, or at least when the gun goes off.  I will be fine, it will be fun and I will finish and accomplish my goals.  I have to remember, this is just practice for IRONMAN Canada, the A race, my true goal in 2013.  How I do at this race gives me a glimpse into how I may do at IRONMAN, but it does NOT define how I will do at IRONMAN because every single day is different.  So, if this race does not go as planned I will still be fine and I will still meet my ultimate goal of becoming an IRONMAN.  This is what I keep reminding myself as I wonder over and over again why I am so nervous for a Half Ironman when I am preparing for a full.

The last thing I want to say is, I have planned my food and drink for the car ride, I have hydrated this week and eaten well, I have stretched and gotten a massage.  I have done the training and I have the ability to achieve my goals, the money is in the bank, it's GO TIME!

The Heat of the Summer - 7 weeks to go

It has been quite the interesting week for me, fourth of July, finally nice, sunny and warm and tons of options for enjoyable things to do.  I've never been great at limiting myself to specific activities, as I always want to do it all.  But this week I was determined to show my dedication to what I chose as my destiny either a few short months ago, or way back in 1988 as a 5 year old...IRONMAN!

I woke up early the morning of the Fourth of July to ensure I got in my long run so I could head out on the lake and enjoy some time with friends.  The morning did not start off as planned, an ankle roll 4 miles into my 18 mile run was NOT part of my plan.  The excruciating pain of the ankle roll caused me to yell so loud the birds literally all flew from the tress surrounding me.  As I hobbled so many thoughts ran through my mind: noooo, this can't be, why me, oh the pain and agony, a sense of defeat.  Then I made up my mind and told myself you can still walk, start jogging, keep moving, yes it hurts but IRONMAN is going to hurt, if you can finish these next 14 miles to total an 18 mile run today, you WILL FINISH IRONMAN.  So, I did it, I kept moving, it was slow and painful but I just kept putting one foot in front of the other.  After about 3 miles I finally stopped from whimpering and prevented more tears from falling.  My mind switched over to a "I got this" attitude as I slowly put one foot in front of the other focussing on a safe and stable step while taking in the beauty surrounding me.  It was an overcast morning, thankfully, and I was on trails surrounded by dew covered ground and lush green trees.  Life wasn't so bad, ankle roll or not, it was the natural beauty and my natural instinct to keep going and succeed that was my blessing that day.  The run finished slowly and painfully, but it got done, and was followed by some aleve and a serious ice session.  

The ankle post run, not too bad, just looks like I have a tumor growing out the side of my foot.

I had an enjoyable Fourth of July on the lake with friends.  Initially I wanted to tip back some drinks and chill, but oddly for me my body simply said no.  I had a few drinks but the day was mostly defined by water, which was fine because I still had a lovely time, minus the extreme burn that made me look like I was wearing a  jersey and bike shorts in the color red as I only burned where I typically am wearing bike clothes, kinda funny.

Happy Fourth of July, even an IRONMAN in training found time to enjoy true Mitten Style!

As the weekend approached I wanted to join my friends out on the river tubing as a river rat with a floating cooler beside me so badly.  This was a true test of dedication for me since I have not been tubing on my childhood river with my childhood friends in decades.  I made the choice to be an IRONMAN and that is what I did.  Up and at em early in the morning, 100 miles of alone time, just me, my bike and the road.

These days of training were hot and humid.  I don't mind the heat or humidity, but my body and performance hates it as I easily get dehydrated and have electrolyte imbalance.  I can honestly say on my 100 mile ride I ended up rationing water, bad move, I should have just taken the 5 minutes to stop at a store and fill up.  Then the next day I was stuck out in the woods on the mountain bike for 4 hours with just two bottles, NOT enough.  HYDRATION HYDRATION HYDRATION.  This leads me to the article one of my IRONMAN teammates posted on facebook.  The article drove home some of my digestive and stomach issues and was yet another important reminder.  If you think you may be dehydrated or have stomach issues, check out this article, I found it very helpful.

100 miles in what might just as well have been 100 degrees...it was actually about 94 plus insane humidity

Throughout all of these days of training I cannot express the impact my friends, family and fellow teammates have had on me.  The constant support, even just a facebook post of "you can do this" or "it's ok to rest", a goofy IRONMAN depiction posted on my wall, a donation to my fundraiser, or a wave as I ride by, has been overwhelming.  I may be a bit sappy to say this, but it almost brings tears to my eyes to know there are people out there that have never actually met me but care enough to send me support.  Training for IRONMAN and competing in an IRONMAN really makes all IRONMAN Triathletes part of a greater FAMILY.  Then I also receive support from life long friends who have always thought I was crazy and possessed or obsessed with working out.  It is so nice to see they get it, or at least get that it is so important to me and are willing to show their support no matter what.  I want to thank every single person that has supported me by sending articles, personal advice, references, referrals, Ironman race reports, words of encouragement and simply asking how I am doing.  You all mean the world to me right now and though I may seem a bit negative at times, please know that each and every word of advice is taken to heart and I am unbelievably grateful.

PSY 101

Reflecting upon my longest workout thus far was oddly similar to reading a psychology 101 book.  I am pretty sure I was the embodiment of every psychological disorder or disease that exists.  I honestly felt manic, bi-polar and schizophrenic throughout the workout.  My emotions and feelings were all across the board.

My goal was to get in a minimum of 8 hours straight working out, I only accomplished 7:20.  The morning started out with me very tired and not wanting to get out of bed, but a cup of coffee and bowl of oatmeal, and a motivating father got me moving.  Within about 10 miles of mounting the bike I was starting to wake up and not act in such a zombie fashion.  I was pretty sure Rick was about to jump out of the woods and take my head thinking I was a zombie.  I gradually started to become more cheerful and carry on more conversation.  I'm pretty sure Dad had no idea how much I would actually talk while training - he did help raise me so he should know I am a jabber jaw and when sitting on a bike for hours what else is there to do other than talk to pass the time.  

As we continued down the road I experienced confusion as we rode over the road markings that were very clearly painted to mark a bike course, how did we not know there was a bike race or tour in our county, we still haven't figured out what event it is, but it goes at least as far south as Lakeview and at least as far north as Big Rapids, it even passes down Buchanan right by our house.  All that discussion about a potential area race led me to get excited about potentially racing in the area and I started to see our pace increase!  As we kept rolling along the pavement the clouds started to roll too, unfortunately the black clouds rolled right on top of us and we ended up in a col rain.  I maintained a positive attitude, there is something about suffering in conditions that most people would not undertake that just makes me feel invisible and like my favorite superhero, the man of steel, Superman.  But, Dad did not share my enthusiasm, he told me we were "calling it" and rang Mom to have her pick us up in Cadillac.  I was disappointed, come on Dad we got this it's not that bad I kept telling him.  He reminded me it would be hours more in the rain, our breaks were not as good in the rain and it was simply not safe on the road, so I accepted that we would be done in Cadillac.

As we continued down the road, my mind set on stopping in Cadillac, the clouds started to break.  Dad called Mom and told her to never mind and return to the cottage because we were now going to be able to ride the whole way.  I literally cried out "mommy noooo", are you kidding Dad, I'm ready to be done, you can't play these mind games with me.  Now that I was ready to stop in Cadillac I had to switch gears to ride the final 50 miles, this is a ridiculous roller coaster ride of mental and physical emotions.  Now I'm just annoyed and feel like my life is that of one led by a torturous slave driving lunatic, Dad.  As we kept pedaling along I gradually pulled myself out of the slump and accepted I had to ride all the way to the cottage.  About 30 miles out Dad pulled away from me on a hill, not acceptable as I am supposed to be a good climber, but I just had nothing in my legs.  At the top of the hill we stopped at a local store and I was feeling quite deprived as I did not have enough money to get my midway, long ride reward, nut roll.  But as I exited the store to see a local country guy lifting Dad's bike in amazement of how light it was, a smile returned to my face. We then listened to the guy talk for about 5-10 minutes, boy was he friendly.  Come to find out he was an HVAC guy just like my dad.  The next 30 miles were rough, I lost Dad completely and when he waited for me I told him to just go and thankfully for him he did.  I spent the last 20 miles going slower than I thought was possible, wondering if I was going to fall over and never move again.  I kept pedaling along, the only thing keeping me going was the thought of coffee and baileys, then I'd think, mmmm wine, then all of a sudden I would be craving Kaluha cake.  Those three items were my best friends the rest of the way home.  

I arrived at the cottage, slower than ever, to put on my running shoes and head out for a hilly 8 mile run.  I had hope that with the run my legs, mind and body would turn a 180 and everything would look better.  1 mile, 2 mile, 3 mile, ok maybe at mile 5 I will feel a bit better as that seems to be the trend lately for how long it takes me to warm up.  Mile 5, cramps, mile 6 more camps, ok this is NOT pretty. I struggled through the entire run focussing on one mail box and telling myself to work hard until the next one, then relaxing a bit and then picking another mailbox to focus.  I got back tot he cottage and saw on my watch that I had literally just ran the slowest pace I have ever ran in my life, demoralizing.  

Though the workout itself was not a positive workout I can honestly say I learned a lot.  I had said I wanted to suffer so I knew what it would feel like to suffer for an extended period of time.  I suffered and I know that as long as I can make the cut off times I can suffer for a long period of time and I can finish IRONMAN.  The issue is I would prefer to gain a bit of enjoyment out of life while doing IRONMAN and not suffer the entire time, but if I do I will at least be happy at the finish and always have that sense of accomplishment.  So, I guess CHEERS TO SUFFERING to experience the biggest accomplishment of my life.

Train and Race Weekend

What happens when you know you need to get in the long durations and miles for training purposes, but also need speed practice, the motivation a race brings and that quality open water swim training?  You do what I did, Saturday 93 mile ride followed by a Sunday morning Olympic Triathlon.  I went into last weekend scared of what the results would be and came out shocked and fearing I didn't do enough in the saddle or on the road.

I started out by doing a light open water swim to loosen up and prepare for a tough weekend.  I also took special care to ensure I fueled and ate properly.  My nutrition wasn't perfect, it is a work in progress, but apparently it was sufficient.  Up and at 'em early Saturday morning for a 93 mile ride from the house door to the cottage door, oh how fortunate Dad and I are to have such a perfect training route and set up for long rides!  I enjoyed good conversation and quality time with my Dad on a ride that I found very pleasing mentally and physically.  It's so important to have a positive attitude while out training for hours on end, I am amazed at how much a good disposition can positively impact a workout.  Upon arrival I did a quick light swim just to loosen up the legs again and try out my new wetsuit for the first time.  I got a protein shake in me immediately, smooth move Megan!  I spent the rest of the afternoon resting and eating properly.  Ok, I better admit it, I did enjoy 2, ok 3 S'mores after dinner, I just can't help myself!

While I was resting the fact that I had to turn around and get up at 4:50am to drive 1.5 hours to do my first Olympic Triathlon (I've done sprints and one half Ironman before) would not stop running through my head and creating a pit in my stomach.  But, I got up early and headed to the tri with the best support crew a person could have, Mom and Dad!

I arrived to see the water temp was 100-101F, yeah right, in little letters below that it told the truth, 57 degrees, WHAT!  I set up my transition, as Dad griped at me for having socks in my transition area - SOCKS, you don't need SOCKS, that is such a waste of time.  I did a light jog for about 15 minutes to warm up a bit and then stretch lightly.  Notice how I do everything "lightly".  I still don't understand warming up for triathlons, but I did know that getting in that lake was NOT going to "warm" me up.  I decided to go to the pre-race meeting and hit the start line shocking my body as I entered the water.  Adrenaline must have been with me because it didn't seem too cold.

The water was choppy and sighting was difficult.  People were swimming all over the place.  I just kept reminding myself that this was good practice.  It was a two lap swim too, just like Ironman, so even better practice.  In the end I swam as close to shore as possible, I almost "beached" myself.  Mom and Dad said I did the best swimming up to shore, many people were running for quite awhile in waist deep water, not good.  But, the swimming to shore did NOT help with the fact that I need more swim practice and I am apparently NOT good at transitions.  As my Uncle said a few days later, "I hear you need to learn to take your clothes off faster!"  I could not get the wetsuit off over the chip, such a disaster, I took too long putting on socks and apparently looked like a lost puppy fumbling around in transition.

Then heading out onto the bike I was ready to roll, stay focussed I kept telling myself, go, go, go.  The first female to pass me popped me right back into gear and I told myself, no way, I hit the pedals and got her back.  Here came my competitive side rearing it's head after years of sleeping (although not nearly as strong and overwhelming as it used to be, which is not a bad thing).  As I tried to push myself I struggled, I dislike feeling uncomfortable on the bike. Ultimately I t hink I could have gone faster, but I did have my own PR for average speed, so I can't complain.  The only issue was apparently drinking Nuun out of my new Aero bottle (first day using it) resulted in the regurgitation of the Nuun!  First time for regurgitation during a workout and first time for a few other things too, good learning situation for sure.

As I transitioned to the run, still slowly, I was ready to do what I enjoy the most, RUN.  yet at the same time I feared what my faster than normal speed on the bike would do to my run.  I never felt very smooth on the run and I felt slow, but I was picking people off left and right.  After the first lap Dad told me I had to pick it up and informed me there was a girl about a minute ahead of me.  I said told myself to relax and let 'er roll.  I had the girl in my sights but couldn't seem to reel her in any closer.  Then all of sudden I had her and she was great cheering me by her.  I love good sportsmanship and cheerful competitors!  I finally was feeling like I had a bit of a rhythm, but I didn't have much distance left on the run.  As I closed into the finish line I came up on a guy and tried to sprint past him, he went from jog to sprint so quickly that we had a super fun sprint to the finish.  Finishing with a huge smile on my face was the best part, oh how fun it is to sprint, which I have not done in years.  So many firsts today.

I finished first in my age group, which I was pleased with, only to find out I was 4th overall female, missing 3rd overall by a mere 19 seconds.  As we analyzed the results I discovered I lost third entirely in transition.  My transition from swim to bike was 39 seconds slower than the 3rd overall girl, I literally lost 3rd place twice in transition alone :(  This did not make me happy and I could not let it go.  But, a good friend told me, it's good you didn't get third, you might not be as motivated to improve those transitions.  I will be working on my transitions, I will be creating a plan for Ironman transition as well.  It is unacceptable in my book to lose a race just because I can't take my clothes off fast enough!

Here's to improving my transitions and working on the swim more.  Hence the next day I went and did an open water swim and transitioned to a run.

 

The Lessons of Ironman Training

Most people get excited for Memorial Day weekend so they have an extra day off work to spend on the lake, on the boat, in the sun, at a campfire pit, fishing, tipping back some cold ones and many more of the typical Norther Michigan enjoyable activities.  My idea of  a Memorial Day weekend was a bit different this year and I am proud.  In general looking back on Memorial Day Weekend and having the extra day to train is a fantastic reminder of utilizing my time wisely, which unfortunately I have not been doing consistently.  Excitement and pride is the result when I do use my time wisely, shame and depression sit he result when I don't.  So, the main lesson here is USE YOUR TIME WISELY.

Instead of hopping in the car with my Mom to head to the cottage on Spider Lake just a bit southeast of Traverse City, I stayed Friday night at home just like my Dad always has.  The plan, join Dad on my first Home to Cottage ride, the habitual weekend century ride (100 miles) for him.  Dad was quite anxious waiting around for me to get ready on Saturday morning, he is not exactly used to having to alter is training schedule for somebody else.  We got a bit of a late start, though it was not my fault, the weather was quite chilly, nope, COLD.  We finally got on the road at 8am, normally a 6am ride start for Dad.  I was really lagging behind, cold tired and grumpy.

As the ride continued I felt extremely tired and simply could not hold on to Dad's wheel to keep the draft.  My mind started to wander and I began to get very upset about how terrible I felt.  I pondered why I felt so terrible and learned that how I felt was ENTIRELY MY FAULT.  I had made terrible decisions all week about my fuel, my nutrition.  I remembered that on Friday I ate oatmeal for breakfast and then did not have time for lunch, though I tried to take a few fork fulls of ground burger to get something in me.  Then after not eating lunch I got home and had a piece of chocolate cake, ran 5 miles, ate more chocolate cake and then had a huge plate of super cheesy nachos (Cheesy Doritos with more cheese).  When I say I am NOT the person to listen to when it comes to diet I mean I am NOT a good example, but listen to this and learn from my mistake; I made horrible decisions and I paid for it.  This is by far not the first time my terrible eating habit have plagued me and destroyed me.  But, when it does happen it at least wakes me up and kicks me in gear to start focusing more.  If I am not lazy when it comes to training I cannot be lazy when it comes to fueling.  One must plan their food intake just like they plan their training rides and runs.

The ride got so bad with so little fuel that I literally was nodding off, as you do if you start falling asleep while driving.  When we made a pit stop for more water I laid down on a bench and almost fell asleep.  I told Dad to just leave me there and I would eventually make my way home.  I of course had to get up and keep following him.  I followed at times so angry I could spit and at other times with tears practically running down my face wallowing in my misery and muttering to myself, "I want my mommy".  Finally we were near the cottage and I discovered it would not be a full century, (house) door to (cottage) door it's actually 93 miles, you wouldn't think 7 miles would make me as joyful as it did, but I was happy to hear Dad say we would NOT be riding around the lake to add ont he 7 miles to make it a full century.

As we arrived at the cottage I knew the horror of this ride was entirely my own fault and I knew I had to suffer my own poor decisions.  I dismounted the bike, found my running shoes and headed out the door for a 5 mile run.  I thought of this as my own punishment, but ultimately it was my reward because I was able to show myself that no matter how mentally defeated I am I personally have the power to turn it around and empower myself to keep going.  My run was slow, but I did it.  If my Ironman ride is miserable as was this ride I know I can view that marathon following the ride as my reward for getting off the bike, and I know I can force a smile on my own face and a giggle out of my mouth to push myself to keep going and cross that finish line.

This major lesson transformed my workouts for the following weekends.  I fueled properly the following weekend, yet I slept too late making me a bit groggy on the ride and not utilizing my time wisely.  Then the following weekend I fueled well, got up early, got moving right away and had a fantastic ride, followed by what apparently is considered a speed workout running when training for tris!  It was never my idea of speed when in college but my goodness is tri training different than just running.  Lessons learned, fuel properly, sleep properly, set proper expectations according to the activity, and make proper use of time.  For a girl who isn't typically very proper it is time to step it up, raise my pinky in the air and curtsy, prior to departing on my rides and runs in the AM.

I have also learned to utilize my Sundays at the cottage on that gorgeous lake.  Sunday of Memorial Day weekend came quickly, which meant another workout.  Short ride to long run, a simple 20 mile ride followed by a 12 mile run to really test where the sprained ankle stands.  I purchased some KT Tape and wrapped my ankle to try it out.  I did my 20 mile ride and then headed around the lake for my very hilly 12 mile run.  I felt heavy and sloppy on the run, but I kept trucking along, again reminding myself how important my fuel and nutrition is to my training.  It may have been slower than I like to run but I got the run done and I worked hard putting in a good solid effort.  Upon arrival back at the cottage a good friend from college, and an amazing athlete and runner came for a visit.  A visit from Adrian is always welcome and always lifts my spirits and makes me smile.  Adrian has been a friend of mine for about 13 years and has always been there for me.  It's the best reminder of how fortunate I am to have such great friends, many of which developed from running and specifically from my amazing Grand Valley State University XC and Track team.

As Adrian is currently injured, never continue to run on a partially torn hamstring...it WILL tear and it WILL take a LONG time to recover, she had to do a good swim workout.  Lets tell a bit of history behind Adrian's swimming.  The summer after our first year of college we were both injured, so we had to swim.  The first time I went swimming with Adrian I was AMAZED by her skills, her doggy paddling skills.  I wish I had a video to showcase these skills.  I know it sounds funny but it is incredible.  If doggy paddling were an Olympic swimming event, Adrian would by far win.  She is smooth, fast and makes it look effortless.  But, we quickly realized Adrian needed to learn how to really swim in order to get in a solid swim workout.  I worked with Adrian teaching her how to freestyle.  About 12 years later we are about to embark on our first open water swim workout together.  I am so incredibly proud of Adrian, she has become a solid swimmer!  I am not surprised considering she is a very dedicated athlete that understands hard and consistent work ethic, if only I had her motivation, consistency and work ethic.  It really is so motivating to see how far she has come with her swimming and it reminds me that I can accomplish anything if I stay focussed, like eating healthy, just stay focussed.

Training for Ironman continuously teaches me lessons.  You may be sick of reading these lessons and think, you already learned that how is it a new lesson?  But, we are forgetful beings, we need reminders and I am the first to admit I start to waiver very quickly, so constant reminders are necessary.

Nutrition is just as important as training.
Make a weekly meal plan to ensure I am getting all the nutrition I need on any given day.
Not every workout will be a good workout, but the "bad" workouts will teach me the most important lessons.
Stretching is a key component to training.  Morning, noon and night.
Start your day with the day, no need to sleep into the afternoon, it's a waste of time and energy.

Cyclist vs. Vehicle - So many lessons learned

As a cyclist you tend to follow things like Velo News and Cycling News, which at times report on a cyclist's collision with a car or unfortunate encounter with road rage.  Most cyclists tend to get very angry when reading these reports, while at the same time fearing a bit for their life, all the time knowing we refuse to give up our love - the sport of cycling.

I personally try to be a very defensive cyclist, while admittedly having little patience for cars.  As a driver, I treat the cyclist just like a car, as I hope to be treated while on my bike.  The other night on my ride I learned a number of lessons related to road rage and life lessons in general.  As you read you may be surprised who was the culprit of the road rage.

It is important as a driver to know your rights as a driver but also the rights of a cyclist.  Cyclists have the same rights as a car, cyclists have the right to the lane they occupy etc., but this does also include a cyclists requirement to obey regular driving laws and, for example, stop at red lights and stop signs (we are all guilty of disobeying, and I am sure we all have a vast array of excused or reasons to try to legitimize what is ultimately illegal behavior).  But as a cyclist we have to realize that not all cars are going to treat us this way and in turn we must be extremely defensive.  In being defensive we must also realize that on a bike we are more vulnerable to all elements, vehicles, weather, potholes, dead animals, people etc.  I personally admit to being extremely defensive after reading the all too true horror stories, and even witnessing, cyclists being ran off the road by cars or attacked and mugged by people.

The other night presented an unfortunate circumstance that I admittedly and regretfully did not handle in a remotely respectful manner.  If somebody disrespects or hurts you, do you hurt them back?  NO - Cardinal Rule.  Disrespect does not lead to respect.  As a large truck came up behind me with the engine revving and then slowed to follow me, I instantly became defensive.  What I consider through personal experience to be a fairly logical response, assuming the person could potentially have rage toward me, started to run through my mind.  I know there are a lot of people who do not think cyclists should be on the road.  I also proceded to have thoughts, that to me are a reality, but in the location and circumstance were extremely unlikely and most people would never even imagine.  Anyway, as the truck tailed me going up an incline I tried to wave it on and I got very frustrated that it would not go.  I finally pulled off the road and as it drove by I did a one finger wave, VERY inappropriate and I am quite embarrassed to admit that my rage and irritation got the best of me.  The better response would have been to ignore the vehicle, just as parents teach young kids to walk away from bad situations.

The truck then proceded to pull over.  The cyclists other fear, and another lesson, Rage leads to Rage. As my heart was pounding and I reached for my phone a man got out of the truck.  He took a few steps toward me and said "Megan" and my heart stopped yet again.  How did he know me, how was this possible.  I have to remind myself I grew up here and it is a small town in the country, everybody knows everybody. This lead to yet another lesson you never know who you could see/run into out on the road, or who could see you without you even realizing it. Yup a childhood friend with a family and kids in the car, I was mortified and felt unbelievably horrible.   Fortunately in this situation my rage did not lead to provoking the rage of the vehicle, but lesson learned because it sure could happen and the cyclist will always lose against the vehicle.

Though my own actions sadden me I am taking this as a lesson well learned and am fully appreciative that it took place with people who are completely willing to address the situation in an adult manner.  As they so eloquently stated, never let the sun set on a disagreement, an amazing lesson I respect them for teaching their kids and using this as an opportunity teach, not only their kids, but me as well.  They are also people who are kind hearted individuals that wanted to make sure I knew the engine revving was not directed at me, ultimately they were following the laws of the road and giving me the space necessary, I just let my testosterone, rapid response and irritation get the best of me.  Being defensive is good, but being overly defensive can cause more problems in the long run.

I am sure this is the reverse story and lesson from what most expected to read in this post, but it is truth and I am sure I am not the only person to whom this has happened.  As cyclist we focus on the rage of vehicles toward cyclists, as it undoubtedly is the most deadly and typically more common, but sometimes it is important to remember the impact we as cyclists can have on life lessons, respect toward cyclists, driving lessons and raising awareness, support and respect for the cycling community.  The road goes both ways.

In sum vehicles and cyclists must follow the same laws of the road.  Road rage from a cyclist or a vehicle never has positive results.  As a cyclist and in particular an individual cyclist, and furthermore a female cyclist, be defensive and intelligent about your decisions, route, destination and time of ride.  Always be aware of your situation and listen to your gut instincts, but also be realistic.  Former trauma often results in what can actually be unrealistic thoughts or fears, take note, learn the lesson, carry it with you, but do not let it control you or drive you to a point of action in which you may regret your future decisions.

DRIVE SAFE

RIDE SAFE

BE SAFE

Introduction to the Life of an Ironman in Training

When I signed up I knew this journey would be exhausting and I would struggle, but by no means did I think I would be so exhausted this early on.  Dad questioned my signing up for the race, not because he didn't believe in me, as he knows I can do this and so do I, but because he wanted to make sure I was making the right decision for me, at the right time in my life, to have the best opportunity to achieve all my goals.  The timing in my life is a whole other story that I may consider sharing at some point.   But all of these statements are about me.

Ironman is not about me.  This Ironman journey is about everybody involved, it goes with the defining word of the team - Kokua: extending loving, sacrificial help to others for their benefit not for personal gain. Through this blog, fundraising, team and personal service projects I am trying to extend a love for a selfless life, a healthy life, and a motivated life to all who read this and surround and support me.  I would be lying to say that this experience is 100% Kokua and not at all about me, because obviously this has been my personal goal for 25 years.  But I can honestly say that this experience and the growth I will gain is also for everybody around me and looking down on me from above.  It is my hope that we can all grow through this experience.

Anybody who knows me knows I am NOT a morning person and even without intense training I LOVE/LIVE to SLEEP.   Ironman training will require A LOT of sleep to allow my body to repair and rebuild, but the duration of training accompanied by the adult lifestyle (I wish I could go back to college and take naps between class) most Ironman triathletes have to maintain, make this a balancing act.  I guess this is one of the many lessons Ironman teaches us, what is the proper balance to life and how do you balance everything.  This is a very useful yet difficult lesson to learn.  People strive their entire lives to learn the proper balance.  Then beyond learning we must put it into action.  If anybody has found the proper balance in life, please let me know.  Fortunately I do not have kids (in the human sense) to balance, as many Ironman triathletes do and as my Father did when he competed, but I do have my pride and joy Tico, the Fuzzy Siberian Husky that requires A LOT of exercise and play time.

Tico 

My balancing act thus far has not been too difficult, but it is already taking a toll on me and I know those morning workouts will become more of a daily occurrence and the evening workouts will only get longer.  I wake up and some days train right away in the morning - out of bed and on the road at 4:50am for TRX and the pool before work.  At this stage of the game most days I just fly out of bed and gather my things and sprint out of the house to get to work looking less than presentable.  I am sure my old college roommates can remember my act of flying around the apartment like I am a crazy person or appear to be escaping a blazing fire in the house.  Training for Ironman is not exactly conducive to looking all prim and proper, at least not for this girl, I do not have the time or desire to care about what I am wearing or how my hair looks.  Then, I sit on my butt working all day thinking about food and trying not to eat only chocolate...for those of you who don't know me I am a SERIOUS Chocoholic in every sense of the word, it's a problem.  Then I drive the 30 miles home and try to get back out training before 6pm, only to finish my workout by 8:00pm or 8:30pm, soon to be 9:00pm.  I quickly try to shove something down my throat because this seems to be the only time of day I don't feel like eating.  At this point I obviously cannot fall asleep right away, so I spend the next hour or two trying to calm down so I can get to sleep.  I also avoid doing any laundry or cleaning so if this keeps up by the time I see Ironman, in August, I will be wearing nothing or super dirty clothes, sleeping on a pile of dirty clothes - I will spare you the rest of this description.  I never end up getting enough sleep so the viscous cycle begins again.  On top of all this I need to complete my application for a post-graduate certificate, continue considering Phd programs, schedule in volunteer time (which I will soon report more on as I just registered to volunteer at the Isabella County Commission on Aging and am super excited), and the list continues.  I am not complaining, I actually thrive off all of this and I know so many people's lives are much more wild than mine.  I am just saying I am tired and fear the training.

I keep telling myself it is going to get better.  I know I jumped into the training quite rapidly and am trying to make up for the lost 4-6 weeks of IM training along with attempting to heal a sprained ankle (so angry at myself about the ankle and so sad), but I also know it is just going to get more intense.  Ultimately what it comes down to is I am trying to do too much.  Dad told me I was going to need to make sacrifices and, as Mom and Dad have always told me, STOP TRYING TO BURN THE CANDLE AT BOTH ENDS.  So friends please bare with me as I disappear onto the road and into the lake this summer, or at least hand me a summer refreshment as I swim by the party boat!

As an Ironman in training I must accept and always remember what the Ironman Foundation - Newton Running Ambassador Team Team Manager shared with us:

It WILL hurt. It WILL take time.  It WILL require dedication.  It WILL require willpower.  You WILL need to make healthy decisions.  It requires sacrifice.  You WILL need to push your body to its max.  There WILL be temptation.  But I promise you, when you reach your goal.  It's worth it!

You should have asked me in the middle of my ride on Saturday if it was worth it.  Started out at 46 degrees with a goal of 60 miles.  As I rode the temperature dropped to 41, and come to find out by the end it was 39.  It started out cloudy and then drizzled a bit and I thought, I got this.  I couldn't figure out why no matter what way I turned it seemed I had to fight the wind.  When I literally witnessed an American flag make a 180 degree turn as I rode by, I realized the wind was my worst enemy and was tormenting me by turning in my face every direction I went.  I decided to view it as my best friend preparing me to be strong in every element for the race, I attacked it head down pretending it was a mountain as I love long climbs that result in a gorgeous view at the top.  In the end the wind covered 360 degrees of directional change, none of which worked in my favor or resulted in a lovely mountain view.  Plus after the light drizzle the sky decided to open up in a downpour rain with the lovely 40 degree temperatures.  I kept my head on and remained mentally strong, literally fist pumping at a few cars that drove by, yelling like a maniac and telling myself how much of a bad ass I was.  I was thriving off my own stupidity and loved it!  Then the moment of mental breakdown came and my mental fortitude suffered.  It's best to train through that mental wall because I am going to have to race through it - good lesson for sure.  I continued and got in 45 miles before I stopped at a friends house sopping wet and shivering.  They fed me and gave me a towel while I waited for my brother to come get me - I love you all for the support (Rachel and Steve Fate and Jesse Doerr).  It was nuts but I am glad I did it, but another 15 miles would likely have resulted in a week sick in bed because my body ended up so sore that night simply because I was extremely tense due to all the shivering.

Tired - who cares I will be mentally strong and force myself to be awake and then I will become smarter and get some sleep.  This is all a learning curve for me.

Cold- I grew up in Michigan, I got this.  Clothing and attitude I can control, weather I cannot, deal with it Doerr.

Too Hot - I have not had this experience yet this year and right now I would love to, but I know when it comes my lack of ability to hold onto electrolytes and stay hydrated will come into play.  I will be smart.  I will drink.  I will hydrate.  I will supplement.  I will wish I was in my bathing suit on the beach in Costa Rica drinking out of a Pipa, as I wish at this very moment.  But I will continue to push and stay focussed and train my hardest.

Being a Badass - That is forever and that WILL be me every day I suffer through the pain and make the hard decision to train instead of sleep or hang out with my friends.  All of those days that nobody cheers me on (though you are welcome to), runs and even walks by my side with a crowd around us or hands me a medal (please let that be the final result)...those are the days that count, those are the days that separate the badasses and doers from the rest, those are the days that result in what I am dreaming to hear - Megan Doerr, You Are and Ironman!

30th Birthday

Yesterday, May 8 was my 30th Birthday.  BIG number eek.  When one is very young 30 seems so very far away.  You typically set all these goals to reach prior to 30, at least I did.  But BAM before you know it you are 30.

My Day:
I woke up in the morning extremely groggy and tired, with a headache and my whole body hurt.  I'm sure this is all attributed to turning 30 and has nothing to do with the sprained ankle a week prior, the intense hours of training, my lack of water intake, my irresponsibility when it comes to getting to bed on time and getting proper sleep or the few tears I shed the night before about turning 30.  Either way, I woke up not so happy but I also woke up to many facebook messages, emails, texts and even a few phone calls from around the world wishing me Happy Birthday.  Throughout the day at work I started to feel better and it was a bright shiny day.  I was also quite excited for a night out with my girlfriends, one of which I had not seen in nearly 3 years.

After work I went home and hopped in the lake to swim to the other side and back (first time in that lake since I was probably 14), a good 38 minute open water swim with no wetsuit.  As I came out of the water my mom was so kind to greet me with a giant blanket and we turned to see the neighbors standing along the shore with binoculars.  They said, "We couldn't figure out what that was out there, it took us awhile.  We've never seen anybody swim in this lake like that."  I smiled and told them it's surprisingly not that cold but you probably will not see me doing that much longer, as the weeds are already growing and later in the summer will likely have taken over the lake.  I walked up to the house with my mom feeling pretty good, it was a nice feeling that they showed interest in what I was doing, the crazy neighbor girl that recently moved home lol!  It's amazing how just acknowledging and showing interest in what somebody is doing can truly make that person feel good (we should all do this more often, even for the little things).  I quick hopped in the shower, got dressed and joined my mom, dad and brother in the kitchen for my cake.  It took all four of us to light the 30 individual candles my mom found funny to put on the cake.  All the while my brother was cracking jokes about how the cake would be covered in wax with all those candles, how the cake might be crushed with all those candles...ok Jesse, I get it, I'm old haha!  We finally got all the candles lit and guess what, I BLEW THEM ALL OUT in one big breath.  I'm positive I had more breath to blow out another 30 too!  I guess all the training pays off, healthy, high capacity lungs, time to get this 30 year old's VO2Max tested I guess!  After demolishing some cake I went and joined my good friends at Blue Lake Tavern (BLTs).  It was wonderful to see them and we had a delicious dinner and some drinks.

The Lesson/Blessing:
I cannot express how fortunate I feel to have such a wonderful family and group of friends.  They are always supportive of my endeavors, though many of them think I am crazy and I am sure they get sick of me constantly saying, I can't I need to train or I will meet you after my ride etc etc.  But, they are still there to support and laugh at me!  In all honesty I kind of like being the one that is a bit different, I don't think it's a bad thing at all!

I think back about all the goals I had set for myself.  A major goal was to complete an Ironman by the time I was 30.  I may not have done it, but at least I am training and ready to complete one within my 30th year!  I also look at some of the goals and think, maybe the first 30 years just weren't the right time or maybe those goals weren't the right goals for me.  Priorities change, people change, and we become more aware about what is important in reality.  I am back living near my family and the good friends I have had my whole life.  I am healthy.  I am working toward accomplishing something wonderful, becoming and Ironman while giving back to the community with an amazing team of triathletes.  I have learned to be more realistic about what is important in life.  All in all it's not so bad being 30.  The best part is the very next day after I turned 30 I was finally able to get registered to volunteer, after 5 months of searching out the right fit, I finally found it.  I am thrilled at the opportunity to start volunteering with the Isabella County Commission on Aging - KOKUA!

30 and Thriving!

Next step - Keep using the heck out of the first birthday present (my lovely Specialized S-Works Prevail KOM helmet) and get out and use the second present, SKY DIVING...who's with me?  I can't wait to jump out of a plain.  When I was little I thought jumping off the deck onto the trampoline was a big deal, then in my 20s my big rush was jumping off a 50 foot waterfall in my favorite town of Montezuma, Costa Rica.  NOW it's about jumping out of a plane at 10,000-14,000 feet...Can't Wait!

Sky Diving's Next!

Learning to Mountain Bike While IM Training - Interesting

So it all started upon my return to the USA (from living and working in Costa Rica) and to my home state of Michigan last June.  I spent most of the summer traveling around Michigan for work and doing my own thing in regards to training, simply for fun, adding in some weight lifting to my routine with some wonderful friends. That summer was all about getting back into the swing of things here in the USA, finding a permanent job and stabilizing.  I did just one event that summer, Ride Around Torch Lake (60 miles), a group ride, not race.  I was able to meet some of my Dad's cycling friends (from Traverse City where our cottage is located, not our hometown).  Then in Fall true mountain biking season started and I attended some races to cheer on my Dad.  At that time McLain's Cycle and Fitness was developing a new Race Team (mountain bike centric) and they needed women; I somehow got roped into being one of the female teammates although I had no mountain bike or mountain biking experience.  Time to buy a mountain bike, which McLain's provided wonderful guidance and help to get me set up perfectly and within my budget.

Throughout the winter I was mentally preparing myself to race mountain bike in 2013 and a few running races and maybe 1-2 triathlons.  Then along came the Ironman Foundation - Newton Running Ambassador Triathlon Team, too perfect to pass up and an honor to be accepted as a member of the team.  Ok, tri training for Ironman Canada is now the main goal and obviously my A race, but somehow I have to balance my previous commitment to the McLain Race Team and race mountain bike, which I am happy to do as they have created an incredible team as well!

The LONG winter in Michigan made training a bit difficult this Spring.  I knew I had my first mountain bike race on May 4, so I had to focus on Ironman training while ensuring to be prepared to race mountain bike. Four times on the trails before the race, I guess it would have to do. Now, it's the week of the race and I'm overbooked at work and exhausted.  The plan to wake up early and do my long run before work was a failure on my part as I did not wake up.  I guess the long run will be run after my evening presentation around 8:00pm, hopefully there will be enough daylight to get me through most of the 14 mile run and enough moonlight to provide a little guidance until I finish, lesson learned - WAKE UP!  About 5 miles into the run I finally start to feel warmed up and a bit more relaxed, less stressed about life (proving how useful exercise can be to providing balance and physical and mental fitness), and starting to clip off the miles at a faster pace.  That was about the same time the sun went down and visibility was more limited.  Then just after mile 8 disaster rears its angry head, the ankle turns, I stumble and try to catch myself bashing my knee to the ground.  I hop and try to keep going, when the car that was at the stop sign nearby rolls down the window and says "You need a ride", they didn't ask they told me.  I tried to put weight on the ankle and quickly dropped my head and said,"Yeah I do".  The two nice older ladies drove me home where I propped my leg up and immediately began icing with tears running down my face.  The tears were more complete and utter frustration at my mental breaking point, fear for my training, fear for Ironman, and then OH CRAP, I have my first mountain bike race this weekend.

Mountain Bike race time it is, sprained ankle reduces my range of motion but I shouldn't need much for biking, time to hit the trails with my intense fear bubbling inside me.  The Mclain's Race Team pushed and motivated me at the race that morning and the day before the IM Foundation - Newton Running Ambassador Triathlon team  sent me off to the race with a nice shout out and support from all over the US and even world (the benefits of such a team, the amazing support)!  I was clearly completely incompetent when it came to mountain biking, not even knowing what gear to start the race in or where I should stand.  Quite different from running races and triathlons to say the least.  But finally off we went and HELL YES THAT WAS A BLAST!  I stayed on my feet and didn't crash, just had to step out a few times, one heading into the finish to avoid the guy that did an endo in front of me.  I thoroughly enjoyed it, it was a rush, it kept me entertained and I felt good.  In the end I didn't race as fast as I thought I had but I still went faster than Dad thought I would so that's a plus and I won my class! The team was super fun to hang out with and shoot the breeze about the race at the finish.

The point of this post is more to explain that everything happens for a reason.  Is mountain biking when one is a complete novice the ideal training plan for Ironman?  Maybe not, the more likely answer is actually NO.  But does it keep life interesting, YES! I also truly believe it is making me a stronger cyclist for the road, considering that is my weakest discipline I need it.  I think the stars were aligned and I was supposed to join both teams at the same time and take on both challenges at once.  I tend to respond best to extreme situations as I am an extreme person.  If it seems too simple I will relax too much.  It's a physical and mental test for me and one I have every intention on conquering. The ankle sprain was an additional challenge and one that I am sure will continue to plague me at least for a few weeks.  But I know for every time I fall, I WILL stand back up and I WILL stand back up stronger, both mentally and physically.  This seems to be the mantra for my life, especially for the past two years.  There are a few quotes that you all have heard a million times, but I want to list them here as they have truly helped me through this past week (and many other times) of injury, trials, tribulations and tests.

Most people told me not to do the mountain bike race after the ankle sprain.  I did it and at this point I am glad I did (hopefully I am still glad a week from now and hopefully that happiness is accompanied by a return to running).  Though I was initially fearful of racing, my ultimate response is "Being realistic is the most common path to mediocracy" - Will Smith.  I will not be mediocre, I will go the extra mile, I will push through the extra pain, I will test my mental and physical limits and then push them farther and farther.  I encourage others to test themselves in various situations throughout life.  It may be testing your educational limits, physical limits or pushing the bar in regards to time to ensure you are working harder and faster to allow you to spend more time with your kids or allot extra time to volunteer a bit.

I didn't know if I was ready to train for and do Ironman, I still don't know for sure.  I also wasn't sure about doing the mountain bike race with the ankle sprain...  but,  "You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only choice" - Bob Marley.  Thus far I have proven strong, I have a lot of room to get stronger and I am confident I can if I keep the path.  Isn't it amazing what testing our limits can teach each and every one of us.  Remember this always, Strength doesn't come from what you can do, it comes from overcoming what you couldn't!  OVERCOME.

Megan and Jeff (Dad) Pre-Race, Sporting my brand new helmet which my family gave me right before taking this picture for my upcoming 30th Birthday (Specialized S-Works Prevail - KOM Color Scheme)

Start/Finish of the Mountain Bike Race - I was told I could avoid that mud pit but apparently that was not an option and I am glad because it was FUN!

Post race discussion while Dad treated himself to a beer and I was smart and focused on elevating and icing my ankle.

Jeff (Dad), Mom (Roberta) and Me - Cheers with my age group prize beer mug and free beer !

TEAM

Last night we had our first Ironman Foundation - Netwon Running Ambassador Triathlon Team meeting.  It was a webinar/phone format and covered a lot of useful information.  I am looking forward to revealing that which could impact my readers soon, as I work with all of you toward what I would consider our TEAM goals.  Each and every one of you that read this blog, support your community, support the Ironman community and support me on any given day, are considered part of this TEAM.  It feels great to be part of a TEAM doesn't it?!  I know I sure felt part of an amazing TEAM last night during the call.

There was a major point that truly resinated with me during our team call last night and I think it will hit each and every one of you.  Considering this is the inaugural year for the team the following question was posed:

Why was the Ironman Foundaiton - Newton Running Ambassador Triathlon Team created?  

There were four main answers, one of which was a homerun and summed up my desire and excitement to be a member of this team.

***To Turn a Selfish Sport into a SELFLESS Sport***

You may wonder, how can you be on a team in a selfish sport, or why would you want to participate in a selfish sport?  Triathlons, in the general sense, are an individual sport, drafting isn't even allowed on the bike.  But teams and sport are more than just the race or game, teams are about the everyday activities.  No matter what the sport or activity a team is the integral part to the entire experience leading up to, during and after an event.  Consider this one definition in the dictionary of the word team: a group of people organized to work together.  This is a very general definition illuminating the vast array of occurrences in which a group of people can come together, and I will add, to bring a positive impact on the members of the group and those the group touches.  To put it into perspective for those who may think they have never been a part of a team - think of your family as your life team, think of your office as a team, or even think of your relationship with God as your two-man team.  There are a million ways any one individual has and can experience what team is in their life.  Today I ask each of you to consider all of the teams you belong to and take this as an opportunity to tell the other members of your team that you are grateful to be on a team with them and that you know as a team you can all achieve success, in various forms, together as a team.  I would love it if you would share the teams you belong to and the success your team has and intends to achieve.  It will be motivating for me, for you, and for all that read.

If you feel like you struggle with the concept of team, please do not feel alone.  I was not always a team player, I struggled with the concept of team when I was younger and how I dealt with that struggle is not something I am proud of.  I struggled with it until I got to college and belonged to a team that helped me learn what team really meant.  I would like to thank my Grand Valley State University Cross Country and Track coach, Jerry Baltes, and all my teammates, for helping me grow and understand the importance, impact (inward and outward) and immense value of team. So if my definition and rambling has not helped you understand what team really means, take a moment each day to consider what I have said.  Look around you, and even ask those around you, what they think of when it comes to team.  If they say a winning Football team, take this opportunity to help them better understand team and plant the seeds I have started to sew here, but of course add your own personal touch of flare and heart.  After all, we are the Humankind Team and if that includes helping each other understand what team means, lets do it!

A note about the Ironman Foundation - Newton Running Ambassador Triathlon Team:
This team is not about the best of the best Ironman triathletes, nor is it about winning.  This team is about taking a sport that has been seen as a potentially selfish sport (I need the newest hi-tech gear I can't donate, I can't volunteer I need to train, I can't spend all day Saturday with my family I need to train, I can't go to Church I need to train, I can't go to the benefit dinner the food does not fit my training diet etc etc etc) and taking the athletes to a point where they join the community and give back through service projects, fundraising and donations, as well as provide examples for others of positive healthy attitudes while facing real obstacles.  I am not saying all triathletes are like the various selfish examples I gave, most that I know are not selfish at all, but the extreme training and lifestyle of an Ironman Triathlete has led to these sorts of stereotypes of Tri Geeks.  I would like to give a shout out to a few very selfless triathletes I personally know that have raised funds and volunteered for the greater good in their pursuit of becoming an Ironman: Michele Prieve Wilkinson and Dan (Dano) Tyler.  There are many that deserve honorable mention but at this time these are the two I have chosen and they make me smile!  The new Ironman Foundation - Newton Running Ambassador Triathlon Team is here to be selfless, self sacrificing and break the stereotype with and Iron Will, just as these two individuals have.  We will show the world, as the running community has through the tragic Boston Marathon events, that we are devoted members of the humankind team for the greater good, not just tri geeks!

Ok maybe I am getting a bit altruistic, but hopefully you get my basic point!